April 2010 Spokes Canterbury
April 2010 Spokes Canterbury
Spokes 1 April 2010 Newsletter
Special Double Issue
City Council to Pay Spokes
The Christchurch City Council has recognised Spokes many years of service to the City.
Mayor Bob Parked cited the recent Jan Gehl report on humanising the central city for opening the city’s eyes. “For years Spokes has been encouraging the city council to enact sensible people friendly transportation and urban planning. While I was reading the Jan Gehl report I had that eerie de ja vu feeling. Finally it dawned on me that this was what those crazy cyclists had been talking about.”
Given that Spokes has already suggested much of what the Jan Gehl report recommends the city has decided to grant Spokes 50% of the report’s cost of $314,000.
Commenting from a special Spokes meeting in the Bahamas a Spokes representative confirmed that Spokes has yet to decide how the remaining funds will be best utilised to further the interests of Christchurch cyclists.
Mayor Switches to Bicycle
Following his return from the Transportation Futures Conference in Copenhagen Mayor Bob Parked has announced that he and the Council will make Christchurch the pre eminent cycling city in New Zealand.
To set the example Mayor Bob has sold the official Audi and bought a very nice step through frame utility cycle in pearl grey with ivory accents. The front basket is of native flax woven by local Maori. Tyres are special order with pearl grey reflective sides. The seat is Canterbury dairy cow hide with merino cover offsetting the pearl grey while complimenting the ivory accents. Silver pin striping with the Mayoral Seal on the head tube completes the display.
A special plexi glass bike locker has been installed at City hall so citizens can view the Mayoral cycle when not in use.
Motoring Columnist Finds Fault in Drivers
Motoring Columnist Bob Blowhard was shocked to learn that some motorists do not obey the road rules.
After years of criticising cyclists for using traffic lanes, parking on footpaths and failing to pay road user fees Bob feels let down by the delinquent motorists. “How can I vilify cyclists when some motorists have been found not wearing seat belts or even failing to maintain proper tyre pressure? I truly believed that the anarchy on our roads was due to the irresponsible behaviour of cyclists and pedestrians. Now I have received proof that some motorists, I am certain it is a small minority, do not abide by all the road rules. I have even heard rumours that some may exceed the speed limit or even run amber lights.”
In light of these revelations Bob has agreed to vilify cyclists no more than once per column.
Police to Enforce Litter Laws
In a dramatic announcement Police Commandant Don Utt confirmed that police are to begin enforcement of all road rules including anti litter provisions. “Many drivers think of the roads as rubbish bins. We are going to build on this habit to fix the problem. Police have asked Christchurch City Council to install rubbish bins at all traffic lights so drivers don’t have an excuse to litter.
Citing the expense of so many rubbish bins the CCC has offered to place an oversize rubbish bin along the new skid pad to be constructed in Cathedral Square. Drivers would have their number plate recorded and could gain points for each successfully lobbed bottle. City infrastructure Tsar Cherry Parfait sees this as encouraging both better use of the central business district and proper disposal habits.
Transport Minister Seeks Safer Journeys
Following the horrific collision between his government supplied BMW limousine and a beer truck Transport Minister Steven Juice has announced sweeping new changes to the Safer Journeys Road Safety Strategy.
Speaking from his hospital bed the Minister declared “That BMW had all the latest safety, braking and road handling technology but could not avoid the accident nor keep me safe from injury. The danger inherent in our over dependence upon technology and on motorised vehicles is now clear. This government will redeploy transport spending to public and active transport.”
Prime Minister Keay commented that he wishes Minister Juice a quick recovery, but in light of his injuries it is clear that he has lost the plot and is to be replaced by Gerry Brownwind at once.
The new Transport Minister declared, “The best journey Steven Juice can make will be to a quiet retirement.”
Northern Motorway Gridlock
With the completion of the Flying Horse development in Weed End and the several dozen copy cat developments the traffic on the Northern Motorway has often crawled to a stop.
Current traffic counts show that the number of cars attempting to travel this route exceeds capacity by a wide margin. The frequent gridlock has resulted in the closure of many of the larger retail developments along the route in Belfast. The empty parking lots are now to be converted to park and ride lots served by shuttle buses.
Studies indicate that there will be sufficient parking remaining to accommodate local requirements and the Belfast area will be served by local merchants meeting local needs.
Late Breaking – Hagley Gold
Clearing out after the Ellerslie Flower Show council contractors have found gold ore underneath Hagley Park. A geological survey followed and indicates that ore in commercial quantities is a certainty.
Overcoming citizen objections to mining in Hagley Park has been made easier as mining companies have announced that all surface work and tunnelling can be accomplished by simply using the existing cycle path system. Speaking at the ground breaking ceremonies MP G. Brownwind explained “Cycling is green, just like mining. They are a natural fit.”
Cyclists are advised to avoid Hagley Park until completion of mining sometime in 2048. “
As long as you can laugh at yourself you will never cease to be amused.” – anon.
Happy April Fools’ Day
“The world is so fast that there are days when the person who says it can't be done is interrupted by the person who is doing it.” – anon.
The Bike Blender by Steven Muir
Meg Christie from Community Public Health was keen to get people into active transport & healthy eating etc and wanted a bike blender that could be used to make smoothies at various biking related events. Steven Muir is into making bike trailers and other biking related gadgets so had a go at the construction.
The first model was used at a free bike maintenance workshop on 13th February at the Linwood Community Art Centre, and at the CDHB go by bike day on 17th February. While it produced acceptable smoothies using frozen bananas and milk it was in need of refinement.
Attempts with front or rear mounting and with removable vs. non removable jugs were fun and enlightening. There is something appealing about having a blender preparing your breakfast smoothie as you ride your bike, but having to do a wheel stand to empty the jug gets tiresome.
Mark II, rear mounted so it could be used with a wind trainer and with a removable jug is much smoother. It shined at the Wild Foods Festival where it made over 100 blackberry smoothies for festival goers.
There are currently two bike blenders both mounted on a rear rack, one with a fixed jug and one with a removable jug. You are welcome to borrow them for school fairs, Spokes rides, or other cycling events. Contact steve [at] cycletrailers [dot] co [dot] nz.
Walking Criminalised
Police in New Jersey, USA received a complaint concerning a suspicious-looking person walking in a suburban neighbourhood.
Finding an older gentleman wearing a hoodie the police asked his name. 'Bob Dylan.' He was unable to provide identification and so was taken to a nearby hotel where his tour bus was parked and proper identification was provided. http://tinyurl.com/yh4dp2d
British Supermarkets Deliver Groceries by Bicycle
Responding to customers preferences at least 4 Waitrose supermarkets are now making deliveries by bicycles with trailers. The stores had found the need to increase bicycle parking spaces and realised that bicycle deliveries were more economical then adding yet another van to traffic.
The cycles have electric motor back-up for hills, carry up to six layers of goods and are insulated to keep cold items cold.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/england/dorset/7992505.stm
British Cycling Up 25%
Cycling England’s efforts to increase cycling have paid off with more then a 25% increase in the six demonstration towns since 2005. With 18 new towns signed on and more anticipated the future for British cyclists is bright.
Towns commit to spend about £5 per capita annually in support of cycling with funding matched by Cycling England using provided by the Department for Transport. The sustainable transport charity Sustrans implemented the program.
Communities built new cycle ways & paths, cycle ways to schools, trained cyclists, installed signage and road markings and developed neighbourhood travel plans.
It will be important to continue and expand the efforts country wide if cycling is to become as popular as in mainland Europe. Cutting congestion, improved public health and reduced carbon emissions are all cited as positive outcomes from the effort. The public health benefit alone is reckoned to deliver a benefit of £2.59 in reduced mortality for every £1 invested.
http://news.bbc.co.uk/go/pr/fr/-/2/hi/uk_news/8529556.stm
Sewers for Bicycle Boulevards
An Oregon USA town has joined their 'green streets' initiative which installs green verges to manage stormwater runoff with their bicycle boulevards building curb extensions to slow traffic. $20 million U.S. of funding will now benefit cyclists and clean water.
No Cars - Cars – No Cars Video
These links to a 7 minute video on “Fixing the Great Mistake” show how Park Avenue in NY went from non car centric to car hobbled and suggests ways to turn this around. http://tinyurl.com/y8f8a9a or http://tinyurl.com/y8mpsrs
Too Many Habitual Offenders
On 27 March the NZ Herald reported on yet another cyclist, a 36 year old father of 3, killed by a car.
An Auckland woman returning home from the dairy about 2 kms from her home pulls into the path of a cyclist, killing him. Had she been on foot or bicycle he would still be alive. But, like most of us, she is a habitual driver. She did not think to walk or ride a bicycle, she drove. It is what she is used to doing.
Driving is an inherently dangerous act. Hurtling along at speed, often in traffic, typically in a hurry, we look out for cars and trucks, are startled by the odd pedestrian and often undone by the quick moving cyclist who simply does not register in our minds.
Cyclists die because of habitual drivers. I cannot recall a story where the driver was on their Learner’s license. Not yet habituated to driving most are still cautious, very aware that they are trying to safely pilot tons of metal and the consequences of a mistake can be grave.
Our current government remains enamoured with vehicles and convinced that road building and technology will make everything better. It won’t, but these habitual drivers are true believers and blinded by their faith, a faith with deadly consequences for too many.
Meanwhile two Auckland families are left shattered and grieving. If the driver is motivated to use her feet to go to the dairy at least some good will have come of it. But if it takes a cyclist dying to get each person to change …
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